Lesson:
We started class by practicing writing an assertion paragraph. Here are some tips:
Well-organized paragraphs have four components that work together to produce a coherent, unified product. Think of each paragraph as a mini-essay endeavoring to prove one aspect of your thesis statement. That is, each paragraph should :
* make a debatable claim (assertion/ topic sentence)
* provide proof for that claim (the evidence or support)
* show how the evidence supports the claim (the analysis)
* contain effective transitions both within the paragraph and between paragraphs so that the reader can follow the logic of the argument (transitions).
Next we worked on introductions
Your first paragraph for this paper should include:
A way to grab your reader that fits your paper.
An overview for your reader.
Your thesis and blueprint.
Here are some good ideas for attention getters:
Introduce the subject with…
Interesting background information
A telling quotation
An illustrative story (keep it brief)
A series of questions
Move from general to specific (zero in on your specific topic just before stating your thesis)
Introductions to avoid:
Using obvious or worn-out expressions:
“I would like to tell you about…”
“According to the dictionary…”
Using say-nothing sentences:
“World War II was a huge war…” (duh)
“Uncontrollable forest fire devastate the landscape.” (tell me something I don’t know)
Asking an opinion question that your audience may say “no” to.
“Have you ever wondered what it would be like to be an astronaut?”
Make sure your attention getter is closely related to your thesis. If it is not, it will not pull your reader into your topic.
Tips on writing an intro:
Write the intro as the next-to-last part of your paper (Title is last)
For a 3-5 page paper, make your intro 1-2 paragraphs. Put your thesis as the last sentence of your intro
The most important sentence of any paper is the first one. Make the reader want to go to the second sentence!
Do not start with dry facts, figures, or statistics such as dates of birth
Do start with sensory details, a story, or whatever works to intrigue your reader
Here's an example of a good intro:
Imagine being thrust away from your family because of an illness. Picture yourself trying to heal in a strange, new environment. Now, imagine that this environment is another country, engaged in a brutal war with your own country during a time where reports of terrible massacres are occurring on a regular basis and your family is under threat by the very people you are living with. One can imagine the cultural conflicts that would arise. This is exactly the case for the main character, Stephen, in The Samurai’s Garden by Gail Tsukiyama. Throughout the book he is recovering from tuberculosis in Japan while war ravishes his homeland, China. In the novel The Samurai’s Garden, Stephen is able to overcome cultural conflicts to form strong, lasting bonds with the people his country are at war with, however, he is unable to connect with the girl he loves the most due to his conflicting culture.
Then we practiced conclusions. They should include:
Transition and echo of the thesis
Re-cap of three main points (do not simply repeat the words)
End interestingly with an application for reader
How do I end interestingly without sounding like a 4th grader?
Suggest a solution to the problem
Say how info. You have presented can affect the future
Put your ideas in a wider perspective
Move from the specifics to the deeper concerns
Raise further questions or implications
State the limitations of your format to explain the idea
Circle back to your attention getter to show how you have developed the idea.
All we need to add now are transitions between each assertion. This can be as simple as
First of all….
Secondly…..
Finally…..
Great authors go further with these and make sure they help the paper flow together.
See me for a sheet of good transitions:
Here are a few:
first
next
finally
although
therefore
similar to that
in addition
They cn also be more complicated and tie everything all together: Metaphors (red thread)
Like an eagle the authors words soar across the page,
But, like this majestic bird, the author sinks her talons into the subject and won’t let go....
HMWK:
Rough Draft of your Samurai's Garden Theme Paper
You can find an outline on the assignments page if you have not done one yet. This MUST be done before the rough draft,
You can find the CIM grading sheet on the assignment page as well.
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